3:30 AM wake up call

We've had the discussion umpteen times. Don't bark at four-leggers that show up on the deck in the middle of the night. But if a two-legger appears, that's another thing entirely. You should bark and let us know. I've mimed two- and four-legged examples using my fingers as little walking figures.

He's getting better, but he still seems to think we need to know when a critter (a four-legged variety) wanders onto the deck.

Last night, at 3:30 AM: bark. Bark, Bark. OMG, BARK, BARK, BARK!!!!!!!!!!!!

I could see that the motion-sensor light had been tripped (and I assumed it was a raccoon or a possum or, God forbid, a skunk), but, still, we sleepily stumble downstairs to see what the racket's all about.

"There's one four-legger and one two-legger, so I think the rule states that I should bark," points out Dieter, the rulebound dog.

This is the sight that greeted us. Ok, he gets away with a technicality, I guess. The one raccoon is being a two-legger. "But mom, you said if it's a two-legger, I can bark, so how come I'm not getting any thank yous for saving your life?"

I can see I need to be even more specific with Dieter and fine-tune the "no barking rule" some more. I'm adding the caveat: if it has fur, don't make a sound. Wondering though--what if the Wolfman ends up on our deck? Are Zombies ever hairy?


I just want to sleep through the night!